Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Hot? Plain? ...or Plainly Hot?

Do you think I put myself in this montage?
Every girl, or woman knows where she stands. She knows if she's hot... or not. She especially knows without a doubt in her mind if she makes heads turn. She just does! Me? After years of therapy I still cry into my pillow nightly have come to terms with my average'ness.

Hence why I've developed such an awesome personality so when people say "oh she's got a great personality" I can know it to be true.

But even if I am awesome (ahem), there are times when I like to fuck with people, just to see how they react (insert evil little laugh and snicker). Like take Saturday night for example. Never mind the cocktail count on my little inner dinger, this happened after only 1 glass of vino... OK, I know, I'm a cheap date, but 1 glass? I'm still totally in control of myself. We went out with a really great friend and his hot beautiful trophy queen of a wife. I mean Gor-ge-oussss (the extra s'es are there for extra emphasis on the s'ness of her sheer beauty).

So we're talking about god knows what, who cares what, when I suddenly look right into her perfect little blue eyes and say "You know how it is for US average girls, it's not like guys are knocking each other out to open doors for US!" Booby stopped breathing. I mean he looked at me with eyeballs bigger than cue balls (still staying in the whole ball department none the less) and didn't know if I was going to start back pedaling or laugh to say it was just a joke or what.

Me? I just waited with a big dumb smile to see what this smoking hot chick would say... Nothing. She said nothing. Now I know she knows she's hot. I think she even knows I know she's hot and would even go a step further to say she knows I know she knows she's hot. Ya follow? That's a whole lotta knowin' going on here for 2 blond girls! Ya see what I'm saying?

So. To this day I wonder what she was really thinking when I suddenly demoted her to my level of looks. Was she happy to be included in my fun club? Was she insulted I wasn't oo'ing and ah'ing over her obvious superiority in outer beauty? Or did she later tell her husband how clueless I was... I wonder. What do YOU think was going on in her pretty little head? Or better yet, how would you react to such a comment?


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13 comments:

  1. I wouldn't care really as I am below average. Women don't even look at me. Ever. I could be the last man on the planet and I wouldn't get looked at. I could walk down the street nekkid with a million dollar bill tied onto my junk and I wouldn't get one look. It has been this way my whole life. I accept it and I am at peace with it, but once in a while it would be nice to be looked at.

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  2. I make sure people look at me... even if I have to take my shirt off in Lowe's to assure they will look. Im an attention whore.. I cant help it. A waaaayyyy average attention whore.

    You know the hot girl went home, ate a gallon of ice cream, recycled it and made an appointment with her plastic surgeon for the next day. Hot girls HATE to be called average.

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  3. Speaking as someone with above average looks (or just an obnoxiously inflated ego... you be the judge) I can say she was probably offended.

    But at the same time you got her thinking. In fact she has probably stared into the mirror for no less then 2 - 3 hours since this encounter JUST to try to help her determine where she stands on the hotness scale.

    And because of you, she has probably knocked herself down a peg or two (good for you) in the ego department. Good thing no one ever comes along and says such things to me.. ha!

    SD
    simpledudecomplexworld.blogspot.com

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  4. being in the I'm far from the loveliest person on the planet, I think anyone that didn't even joke about it at the time, is stuckup. Geez, she could have joked around.

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  5. She was probably offended, but I wonder if she admitting to being offended? Was she hot AND dumb? Because only a completely vapid moron whore would just outright own that sort of conceit.

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  6. The fact that she stayed quiet shows she was bothered. Either that or trying to wrap her mind around the idea of being less than perfect caused a system overload. Either way, her ego probably needed a good deflating.

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  7. I would have to agree with Simple Dude...on all counts. I fancy myself to be pretty hot...and average all at once. Especially on a day like today.

    I say *high five* for saying it!

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  8. 1: LOVE IT!

    B: I think she was confused.

    iii: She could've redeemed herself if she'd made a joke.

    IV: I say 'yes, you are hot, but then so am I'.

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  9. She was pissed.. beautiful people are used to being acknowleded. But I love that you did that to her.

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  10. I'd fuck with you back and say, "speak for yourself beoootch"

    then I'd probably cry myself to sleep about being average.

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  11. LOL! I would have loved to have had a photo of that look.

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  12. Honestly, I don't think she thought you meant her in the collective "us". I am sure she thought you meant yourself and all the other average girls out in the universe.

    Poor Booby and his eyeballs.

    P.S. Does Booby read your blog?

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  13. @ Oilfield: I promise if I ever cross you, I'll look at you while you'll be busy looking at a hot chick...
    @ Holly: bwhahahaha!
    @ SD: that penguin looked above average...
    @ Dazee: I think she was dumbfounded...
    @ Irishgrudge: I wish I knew if she ever admitted to it or not, I'll find out eventually (and let you guys know, heh heh)
    @ Vinny: I'll go with the overload option
    @ Cinderita: thanks! and I love your name btw
    @ Nenette: love your numbering system!
    @ JJ: aaawww I love you too!
    @ Stacie: I wonder if she cried about it?
    @ Christy: yeah, some moments need to be captured!
    @ Catou: no Booby does NOT read my blog! thank god...

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Unless you are a zombie or a fembot, your comments are totally appreciated! Loved. Desired. And wanted (I added that in case it was not clear)