Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Day I Went Too Far

When I was about 13, my friends and I thought it'd be funny to moon. The joys and excitement of living in a subuuuurbbbb.  My mom being recently divorced, wild and crazy in her mid forties, often went out dancing with her friends. This was our ticket to wander the streets with our friends (after the street lights came on).

My friends, actually they were my sister's friends who allowed the kid sister to tag along because my sis was after all the most popular one... egged me to pull my pants down and moon at every passing car. I wanted to be part of the gang, so I pretty much did whatever they asked me. Spineless.

I got home and my mom was fuming in the kitchen. No, that's not french for smoking a cigarette. (Actually it kinda is, but...) That's international for pissed off.

"Why did I see YOUR ass on the side of the road? And don't even try to deny it, I would know that ass anywhere! What were you thinking?"
Obviously I wasn't. Thinking that is. And how in the world can she point out MY ass from any other? I didn't walk around naked in the house. Did she have a nanny-cam in my bedroom?

Sometimes we do shit. Say shit. Without thinking. Cause it's fun to be a daredevil...

No more clown stuff though. This world is not ready for it...  Maybe.

3 comments:

  1. My brother mooned a car once and I got in trouble for it. Better to regret the things you have done than the things you haven't. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. LMAO! So, I always got caught every time I did anything wrong. I would come home and my mom would ask me why she saw me doing so and so. I was like..do you have spies?? It's the eyes in the back of the head thing.

    ReplyDelete
  3. My mom would totally have recognized my ass too. Although now she would be confused b/c I had that giant mole removed and it looks like a baseball, what with the stitching and everything... and the roundness...
    but I'm betting my mom would still be able to pick my ass out of a lineup.

    on a related note, my mom once came home at 3am after she got divorced. I was sitting in the den going "I was SO WORRIED about you! You didn't CALL and look at you - 3am on a weeknight! You should know better young lady!"
    Her response? "Give it up. I just saw Jack pull out the driveway" (my bf)

    ReplyDelete

Unless you are a zombie or a fembot, your comments are totally appreciated! Loved. Desired. And wanted (I added that in case it was not clear)