Monday, July 12, 2010

Get the Joke?

THE ASSIGNMENT: Write about a joke that did not go over well. 

This is my first edition of this week's Mama Kat's assignment. I actually chose another one to write about but it requires more work and actual research. I just wanted to throw this one out for now because it shows just how bitchy facetious I can be. And how I wish people could get me and stop being so insulted about my flippant character!


"You know when you enter a room and suddenly you and everybody in that room are totally aware that you are the most beautiful person in that. very. room. And then there is this moment of silence as all are aware and know that you know, and you know they know, how uncomfortable it is to be in that spot. Yeah, it happens to me all the time and although you may think it would be a fun thing to happen, it isn't. Trust me, knowing you're the most gorgeous person is not that fun when everybody else is also aware of it and you just want to tell them: don't feel inferior to me, I know you have inner beauty, you do!"

I thought this joke would break the ice when I found myself surrounded by a group of professional women. Women clearly superior to me. Women I thought could get such a joke but the reaction was a stone cold one. One lady even went as far as saying: "Oh get over yourself, you're not that pretty!"

And the thing is... I'm NOT pretty! I have the kind of face labeled as only a mother could love, or a face for radio, or a face only a female stand-up comedian could make a success of! Oh, and my boss had to personally apologize for me to all these cunts women. Of course they made a personal complaint to my entire team of bosses. WTF! Get a life ladies! Pull that cucumber outta ya asses and maybe you'll get to enjoy yourselves a little more!

p.s. Urban dictionary describes facetious as: To make an attempt at being funny, while being sarcastic at the same time. AND An asshole's word for "sarcasm".


  1. I would have told ms stick up her ass... Neither are YOU!

  2. You must be the smartest person in the office. Who would not know it was a joke? Oh yeah, those people who take everything personally cause they HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOR!

  3. I would have laughed hysterically at that. I'm all about self-promotion even if it comes in joke form!

  4. omg!! I've got to try that one!!

    On a side note - I don't think I'm ready to read your blog yet, it still hurts to laugh!!

  5. @ Holly: I was just so shocked at the reaction. I thought it was obvious I was joking, what with my huge smile and rolling eyes...
    @ Christy: People just need to fart above the hole, if you know what I mean?
    @ Cecelia: I wish you were there, I would have needed a good audience like you to let others know when it's time to laugh!
    @ Jennifer: please do try it and let us all know how it went, and sorry to cause you pain!

  6. sarcHasm is the gulf between my sense of humor and everyone else who doesn't get it ;) great post, I can relate


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