Friday, February 3, 2012

Lemme Tellyou About My Hair

I have a cow's lick. That expression is so gross! But the stupid cow licked me right where my part ends. So if my hair isn't set right, it actually looks like a bald spot.

Yes. I'm too sexy for my hair.

The day I actually wash my hair, it goes totally unnoticed to the untrained eye. I still see it (with the help of 2 mirrors placed just so, but I'm a trained professional in finding personal flaws).

But... living out here where we have to run the water maker for 8 hours to fill our water tank, which needs to be run on the generator for which we have to walk to a gas station to buy fuel - showers are a luxury! Don't even get me going on what it takes to heat up the water! So I wash my hair on average once or twice a week. It helps that I dive 2-4 times per week. And that the air is dry, otherwise I'd look like George Clooney in "Oh Brother" with his pomade. Yup, I'd be: The Daper Dan (Wo)Man!

The dirtier it gets the harder it is to handle and maintain the B-spot. But my hair clearly wants to separate where the part ends. As my last shower becomes more and more a thing of the past, the more it splits apart like the Red Sea.

Why am I telling you this?

I don't have a single iota of a clue. But its been bugging me all morning, and I guess I needed a stranger's shoulder to lean on. Hold me! I almost look like I'm balding on bad hair days!

Muwah!  ;)


  1. haha sometimes you just got to let it out...smiles.

  2. Ok! Here's what you gotta do! First whip up two egg whites, then add a little squirt of Elmer's glue, then a table spoon of mayo. Ok! Now add it to the problem spot in your hair. Rub it in Really good! Put on some crazy 80's hair band like Metallica or Slaughter... yeah that's it. Now do some head banging! Don't hold back! You gotta really get into it! Now look in the mirror. See? Problem solved!!

  3. It the previous suggestion doesn't woke, I imagine you can get some lively hats when you next go into town ;)

  4. Hats are always good. Or colour. Make it a funky colour and people wont notice the part.

    Loved this post. It really made me smile just when I needed one.

    “Lizard Happy”

  5. @ B'Man: at least you get me! ;)
    @ Lil Dreamer: signs that you were once a real wild one hunh?
    @ Vinny: hats! I have hats galore! And scarves... and bandannas... and elastics...
    @ Minx: Glad you smiled! Hey thought about you yesterday when I walked into a funky little art shop that offered workshops. Will be trying to do fish outta paper mache!

  6. Oh dear... I feel your pain. I so feel your pain. The cow's were hungry the day I was born. I have a toilet swirlie on the top of my head. I have a lick that goes toward my nose on the right side. I have another, that also goes toward my nose, on the left side. The effect is like a wind blown Zuko in the rain after being slushied in the halls of Glee.

    I feel you. Thank god for weave, hats, and wigs. Sometimes all at once.

  7. Hahaha ugh. Yep, sign me up for the cow lick club. I've considered shaving my head more than once, but I already live in Idaho and am learning German and with my luck, there's probably a swastika shaped birthmark under my crappy hair.

  8. There's a little bit of carney folk in all of us. We camp about a third of the time, so we have some of the same hot water issues.


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